Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure subtitles

[filming]

SHARPAY
(SINGING) There’s a moment when you realize that something’s changed

BOI
(BARKS)

SHARPAY
And all the bits and pieces start to fit
It’s so fab!
When nothing that you know will ever be the same
Ring the bell

(RINGS)

SHARPAY
That’s my cue
Gotta try something new
Gonna shine
And make the moment mine
Now my time has arrived
Gonna shine so bright
The sun will run and hide
And I’ll be the only star that lights the sky
I’m gonna shine

Listen up, fellas.
Now there’s nothing in this universe to hold me back
Bye, Gab.
No endless night can keep me in the dark
And I just might give my dear old dad a heart attack
But he’ll live (he’ll live)
And he’ll see (he’ll see)
What his girl is meant to be

Gonna shine
And leave the past behind
Gonna try to fly so high
Gonna climb
And make the prize all mine
Then I’ll write my name in letters across the sky
I’m gonna shine

And if my present luminescent state is second rate
I’ll turn it up a notch past nine
And watch the world go blind

Got a diva dazzle that you just can’t touch
Like an angel in Armani, I’m too fabulous
They’ll be lining up for blocks once I bop to the top
With a poochie in my Gucci, I just can’t be stopped

I’m gonna shine
And make the moment mine
Now my time has arrived
Gonna shine so bright
The sun will run and hide
And I’ll be the only star that lights the sky
I’m gonna shine

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)


CUT TO:
There she is. Wonderful!

WOMAN 1
Hi!

SHARPAY
I know, I know.

WOMAN 2
I loved it.

DARBY
Excuse us. There’s our little superstar!

VANCE
Princess, you had better watch out for law enforcement. They are gonna come after you for stealing the show!

DARBY
Honey, on a scale of one to 10, you were an entirely different scale. And you know my aversion to scales.

Sharpay!

SHARPAY
Yes, I know. And thank you.

We’d like to introduce you to Jerry Taylor. He’s a good friend of our family, visiting for the week.

JERRY
May I just say how wonderful you were?

SHARPAY
As many times as you’d like!

(ALL LAUGHING)

JERRY
I really see a unique talent here. I mean, a true gift.

SHARPAY
And your kind, true words are a gift as well. It was so nice to meet you. But if you’ll excuse me, my friends have been waiting.

JERRY
I’m a casting agent from New York.

SHARPAY
And will keep waiting until I tell you how much I love your suit.

(ALL LAUGHING)

JERRY
I’m about to start casting for a new musical on Broadway.

SHARPAY
Broadway? As in “Broadway?”

JERRY
Yeah. And I think that there is a perfect part. I would be more than happy to arrange an audition if you happen to find yourself in the Big Apple any time soon.

SHARPAY
That would be… I would be… It would be, like…

JERRY
The show is gonna star Amber Lee Adams.

SHARPAY
No.

JERRY
Yeah.

SHARPAY
Stop. Seriously, stop.

DARBY
Who’s Amber Lee Adams?

SHARPAY
She’s only the most amazing performer ever! We have so much in common.

JERRY
I won’t keep you. It was so nice to meet you, Sharpay. Congratulations again. And, who knows, maybe we’ll see you in New York. Okay?

Congrats!

Bye.

SHARPAY
Toodles! Yes! Yes! Yes!


CUT TO:
VANCE
No!

SHARPAY
No? I don’t understand! What language is that?

VANCE
No, I don’t think going to New York is a good idea.

SHARPAY
(EXHALING) See, there you go, believing everything you think.

VANCE
Do you really believe you’re ready for such a monumental step?

SHARPAY
Daddy, the main reason I buy such expensive shoes is to take monumental steps.

VANCE
Sweetheart, when you graduated from high school almost a year ago, do you remember what you said to me?

SHARPAY
“How come no one makes a cap and gown in hot pink?” “How come you get a car and driver and I don’t?”

VANCE
No.

SHARPAY
“Good luck finding anyone to fill the talent-less void of boring and unattractive that will exist in these hallways once I graduate”?

VANCE
No. Well, yes, but you also said that you needed a year to find yourself, to figure out what came next in your life. That year’s almost up, and you haven’t found anything.

SHARPAY
It’s a small town. I mean, there’s only so many places to look. Besides, I did find something. A show I wanna be in.

VANCE
This is more than just a show. You’re talking about going it alone in the big city.

SHARPAY
Right! To star on Broadway with Amber Lee Adams. Could you really deny the world that opportunity?

VANCE
I’m sorry, princess. But nothing you’ve shown me convinces me you’re ready for something like this.

SHARPAY
Okay, ladies. Team Sharpay. Mission: New York. Daddy says I’m not ready for this. So, what does that mean?

You pout, throw a tantrum, and he buys you a new Burberry bag to make you feel better?

SHARPAY
That’s good, but no. It means we show him I’m determined. And when I make up my mind…

And no one is better with make-up.

(GIGGLING)

SHARPAY
…my mind looks amazing. Okay, here’s your assignments.

I texted Bridget, who e-mailed Constance, who tweeted Bethany, who IM’ed Jenn, who Facebooked Kara, who has an ex-friend who she caught with her boyfriend, who she then dumped, so now Kara’s her friend again, who knows of a New York apartment available in a luxury townhouse. That is, like, the best house you can get in terms of towns.

SHARPAY
Sounds perfect.

It gets better.

SHARPAY
It can’t.

But it does: It is equal distance from both Chanel and Wicked.

(SQUEALS)

SHARPAY
Okay. Now, on to travel plans.

That’s right. Albuquerque to New York. One adult and one dog. Excuse me? Coach?

(GIGGLING)

Hi, I’m calling for Sharpay Evans. Mr. Taylor wanted to set up an audition with her for a new musical. Two weeks from today is perfect.

(BOTH SQUEALING)

SHARPAY
Now, new outfits. And this would be for opening night.

(ALL EXCLAIMING)

The beading actually doubles the reflection of paparazzi flashbulbs!

You can wear anything. You should have your own reality show called I Can Wear Anything. Where you wear anything.

SHARPAY
All right. I’m ready to show Daddy what we’ve accomplished. Ladies, and people I don’t know, New York is calling. And this is one call that is not going to voice-mail.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
So, by way of review, this is my shoe closet, that is my bedroom, these are my new clothes and where I’ll wear them, and then I’m a star! See?

VANCE
(SIGHING)
I’m just not totally convinced.

SHARPAY
Daddy, you said I haven’t shown you anything to let you know I’m ready for this. But, look, I took matters into my own hands, and without even chipping my manicure.

VANCE
Sweetheart, it’s not as easy as putting pictures on boards.

SHARPAY
But I’ve worked everything out! And used this pointer.

VANCE
I don’t know…

SHARPAY
Please, Daddy.

VANCE
Alone, in New York?

DARBY
My dear college friend, Michelle, has a son that goes to NYU. I’ve met him. He’s a very nice boy. I could ask her to make sure that he keeps his eye on you.

VANCE
Are you sure you’re ready to take this on?

SHARPAY
I know I can do this. I know it like I know purple washes me out and that my eyes are the exact same distance apart to be a supermodel. What I don’t know is whether you believe in me. Mom seems to. (SIGHING HEAVILY)

VANCE
Okay, you have my blessing.

SHARPAY
(SQUEALING) Thank you, Daddy!

DARBY
I’ll call my friend Michelle and have her talk to her son.

SHARPAY
Thanks, Mom.

VANCE
There’s just one condition.

SHARPAY
Fine. I love a good conditioner.

VANCE
You have one month. I’ll fly you to New York, I’ll pay for your penthouse, but you have to get yourself in that show and prove to me you can take care of yourself. One month. Deal?

SHARPAY
So deal!

VANCE
But if it doesn’t work out, you come back here and work for me. At the country club.

SHARPAY
(STAMMERING)
Work?

VANCE
A job. That’s the deal. Prove yourself, or come back in a month and work for me.

SHARPAY
Fine. Prove myself it is!


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
Look!

(BOI BARKS)

SHARPAY
Look, Boi, look!

MARJORIE
Sharpay?

SHARPAY
In the flesh and pastels!

MARJORIE
We’ve been awaiting your arrival.

SHARPAY
Then the wait’s over!

MARJORIE
We spoke on the phone. I’m Marjorie Grande, the manager for the building.

SHARPAY
My pleasure.

MARJORIE
Please, follow me to the penthouse.

SHARPAY
Ooh!
(SIGHS HAPPILY)

MARJORIE
I hope this is to your liking.

SHARPAY
No. It’s to my loving! Boi, you’ve gotta see this.

MARJORIE
That’s a dog.

SHARPAY
Try to get him to believe that.

MARJORIE
I’m sorry. There are no dogs in the building.

SHARPAY
Sure there are. See?

MARJORIE
The members of the co-op board have a strict no-dog policy.

SHARPAY
Well… My father heads our country club board, so I’m sure that gives me some kind of board immunity.

MARJORIE
Miss Sharpay, this building is pleased to have you. This dog… Not so pleased.

SHARPAY
Miss Grande, Ma’am. If he goes, I go.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
What are you doing?

PEYTON
Filming you. Just keep doing what you’re doing.

SHARPAY
Do you always just film totally stunning people on the street that you don’t know?

PEYTON
Only when I think the subject is interesting. And you look baffled and scared and really pink. So, yeah, interesting.

SHARPAY
Are you paparazzi?

PEYTON
I’m a film student at NYU, working on a short film. The assignment is to capture one unique New York story. Maybe you’re it.

SHARPAY
So, you decided to film me without my permission, just for a school assignment?

PEYTON
Yep.

SHARPAY
How dare you! And my left side is better for close-ups.

PEYTON
(LAUGHS)
I’m Peyton.

SHARPAY
Sharpay Evans. Actress, heiress, soon to be Broadway legend.

PEYTON
Wait!

SHARPAY
About 105, but it’s really not polite to ask.

PEYTON
No--

SHARPAY
I should know my own weight, okay?

PEYTON
No, I’m Peyton Leverett. Our moms went to college together. This is crazy! I was on my way up to your apartment to make sure you were okay. And here you are.

SHARPAY
Right, they told me to expect you.

PEYTON
Well, glad we could finally meet.

SHARPAY
Oh, and this is Boi.

PEYTON
Well, nice to meet you, Boi.

BOI
(BARKS)

PEYTON
So, why are you out here? Is everything okay?

SHARPAY
Not really. When I rented this apartment online, it never said they don’t allow dogs. And now they won’t let us live here. Yeah, well, it’s their loss!

PEYTON
Do you have someplace else to go?

SHARPAY
Okay, it’s my loss and their loss! (SIGHING) Actually, the only place I have to go is home. And trust me, that is not an option!

PEYTON
Listen, there’s an empty studio in my building, if you’re interested. I’m friends with the building manager. I’m sure I can make a call.

SHARPAY
And…

PEYTON
Well, I’m sure I can make a call and arrange something. Maybe get you to see it.

SHARPAY
(SIGHS)
Well, since I don’t seem to have any other options. Bellman!

PEYTON
Oh, yeah, right. (LAUGHS) ... Seriously?


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
Careful with those! This is all I have to get by on until the truck arrives with the bulk of my things.
(SCREAMING)

PEYTON
Oh! That’s good. Okay, now, go outside, and then come back in and give me even more of that it’s-the-end-of-the-world look. Okay?

GIRL 1
Hey, Peyton.

GIRL 2
Hey, Peyton!

PEYTON
What’s up?

GIRL 1
Off to acting class. (IN SOUTHERN ACCENT) “Maggie, the cat is alive. I’m alive!”

GIRL 2
Singing lesson. (VOCALIZING IN HIGH VOICE)

PEYTON
Cool, guys. Okay. Hey, this is Sharpay and Boi.

GIRLS
Hi, Sharpay. Hi, Boi!

GIRL 1
Anyways, gotta go. See ya, Peyton.

GIRL 2
Nice meeting you, Sharpay.

PEYTON
Later, guys. Okay. Really, you’re going to love this place. Okay? Up you go. Sorry. It’s a pre-war building.

SHARPAY
And during the war, they didn’t fight for an elevator?

PEYTON
Listen, the building has two things going for it: It’s got something available, and I live here.

SHARPAY
(SCOFFS) (SIGHING) Fine. But if I break a heel, or a sweat, you’re responsible. Get my bags.

PEYTON
(PANTING)

SHARPAY
See? That wasn’t so bad.

PEYTON
Yeah. Down the hall. The one with the police tape and chalk outline.

SHARPAY
Really?

PEYTON
Kidding.

SHARPAY
You said this was a studio.

PEYTON
It is.

SHARPAY
No way! MGM was a studio! This? This is a roach motel with no room service.

PEYTON
Yeah, a studio apartment.

PEYTON
Sure, from certain angles, it’s a bit small.

SHARPAY
A two-karat engagement ring is a bit small! This is a doll house!

PEYTON
So what do you think?

SHARPAY
Forget it! I’d need an entirely separate apartment just for my lipsticks. And where am I supposed to sleep? What is that?

PEYTON
It’s your bed.

SHARPAY
That is not a bed. It’s a closet with a tongue. You can’t be serious!

PEYTON
There is one really good thing about it.

SHARPAY
Yeah, sure.

PEYTON
See? This is my place! Looking better, huh?

SHARPAY
Am I missing something? Oh, right. Space! Luxury! Maid service!

PEYTON
Let me guess: You’re used to being spoiled.

SHARPAY
I’m not used to it. I just expect it.

PEYTON
You know, half this building is filled with performers who came here with the same ambitions you did. What makes you so much better than them?

SHARPAY
Money, breeding, talent, great hair, perfect jaw line, chic taste. How much time do you have?

PEYTON
All right, fine. I tried to help you out like my mom asked, but whatever. I’ll find someone else to film.

SHARPAY
The only problem is if I call my father and tell him how I messed up on the other apartment and how I have nowhere to go but here, and I ask for his help, he’ll make me come home and… (STAMMERING) Work!

PEYTON
So?

SHARPAY
So? Then I’ll never get my big break. Oh, and promise you won’t call your mother and tell her about this, because then she’ll call my mom who will tell my dad, and I don’t think he really believes I can make this happen. He only gave me one month to prove it.

PEYTON
Well, then you’ve got one month to prove him wrong.

SHARPAY
(GROANS)
Why did I do this? I want my canopy bed and my housekeeper. And a shower that doesn’t share a room with a kitchen.

PEYTON
Come on.

SHARPAY
Where to?

PEYTON
Do you trust me?

SHARPAY
You suggested this place.

PEYTON
Yeah. Point taken. Come anyway.


CUT TO:
PEYTON
Come on.

SHARPAY:
I hope you’re taking me to a better apartment than what you just showed me. Because let me tell you, if that’s it? No way! Absolutely no!

PEYTON
Just come on. Just don’t ask any questions.

SHARPAY
I need luxury! Are you kidding me? That was like a green, dark hole that I never wanna be in ever again.

PEYTON
All right, here you go. Butchy! Come on…

SHARPAY
Where are you taking me?

PEYTON
You’ll see. Come on.

SHARPAY
Why are we here?

PEYTON
All right, all right. Now, you’re gonna have to close your eyes.

SHARPAY
Close my eyes?

PEYTON
Yeah, just close your eyes.

SHARPAY
Why?

PEYTON
Because! Just do it. All right, now. Keep them closed.

SHARPAY
Well, what if I hit into something?

PEYTON
You won’t. I got you. All right, all right. Keep them closed.

SHARPAY
All right.

PEYTON
All right, you got them closed?

SHARPAY
Yes, I do.

PEYTON
All right, all right. Perfect. All right. Now, stay here, keep them closed.

SHARPAY
(SIGHS HEAVILY)

PEYTON
Keep them closed. All righty. Keep them closed. All right. Open them. Hit it, Butchy! I know. When I left Indiana to go to school here, I didn’t know a soul either, and I was just as overwhelmed as you. But I had two things, my dream and my camera. And look at me now.

SHARPAY
You still only have your dream and your camera.

PEYTON
Yes, but I met you, didn’t I? So, something’s working out.

SHARPAY
Well, whenever people meet me, things get better.

PEYTON
(LAUGHS) Look, you just have to adapt to your surroundings. And remember that for now this is all just temporary.

SHARPAY
Right. Like prom dresses and first boyfriends.

PEYTON
Look, anything you have to do will be worth it to get your dream.

SHARPAY
Okay. I’m gonna meet with that casting director, get the part, be a star and have a palace!

PEYTON
There you go. That’s the self-indulgent, self-entitled, optimistic pink hurricane I’ve been seeing through my lens.

SHARPAY
And I like how perceptive you are. Okay, New York. Bring it on.


CUT TO:
PEYPAY TOURIST MONTAGE; SOUNDTRACK: "WALKING ON SUNSHINE" - ALY & AJ COVERING KATRINA AND THE WAVES

SHARPAY
(SHRIEKING) Turn it off. Turn it off!

PEYTON
(LAUGHING)

SHARPAY
What?


CUT TO:
PEYPAY DECORATING

SHARPAY
Oh, yeah!

PEYTON
Looking good. So pink.

PEYTON
You’re good.

(BOTH CHATTERING)

PEYTON
Do you wanna try some?

SHARPAY
No, I don’t want any!

(BOTH LAUGHING)

SHARPAY
Lay down. Lay down. (LAUGHS) Night, Boi! (SHARPAY SQUEALING) (MUFFLED) Boi? Get help!


CUT TO:
NEXT MORNING

(BANGING ON DOOR)

SHARPAY
(FAKING GASP)

PEYTON
Knock, knock.

SHARPAY
Come in!

PEYTON
Wow! And wow. Hey, are you on your way to meet with the casting director?

SHARPAY
No, I’m on my way to change theater history. You think this is a good outfit for changing history?

PEYTON
Perfect! Mind if I tag along and film? Not that you could ever mind me, right?

SHARPAY
I think you should. After all, not many people can say they were there to film the creation of a legend.

JERRY
Sharpay! You made it after all!

SHARPAY
Destiny called, and I get great reception!

JERRY
Well, your timing is perfect. What’s tomorrow like for you?

SHARPAY
The first day of the rest of my fame.

JERRY
Well, all right. I’ll set up your audition for 3:00. I’ll e-mail you the musical number that we’d like you to prepare. And could you make sure that he’s well-groomed and, you know, takes care of any business beforehand.

SHARPAY
What?

JERRY
What?

SHARPAY
He?

JERRY
Yes.

SHARPAY
Him?

JERRY
Him.

SHARPAY
He?

JERRY
Yes!

SHARPAY
Wait, what?

JERRY
It’s your dog that we want to audition. He was amazing!

SHARPAY
(LOUDLY) What?

JERRY
I mean… I sent you all the information in response to your e-mail. I mean, didn’t the title of the musical give you any indication? A Girl’s Best Friend?

SHARPAY
A Girl’s Best Friend! And I’m here for the girl!

JERRY
You’re here for the girl?

SHARPAY
Well, I’m never the best friend!

JERRY
Oh, no. No, no. We wanted Boi.

SHARPAY
As the girl?

JERRY
No, as the best friend.

SHARPAY
Wait, wait. You wanted Boi as the best friend of the girl? Not me as the girl with the best friend?

JERRY
Exactly. Oh, Sharpay, I am so sorry for the confusion. If you don’t want Boi to audition, I would totally understand.


CUT TO:
PEYTON
Sharpay. Sharpay! Hey, stop.

MAN
Hey, don’t touch the car!

PEYTON
Look, slow down. Even New Yorkers can’t keep up with you.

SHARPAY
It’s not even me they wanted!

PEYTON
Well, to be fair, the role is for a dog. If they wanted you, I could understand you being upset.

SHARPAY
Why did I come all this way? Leave my friends, family, a dry, self-hydrating climate?

PEYTON
To follow your dream! Or at least that’s what I thought.

SHARPAY
Nothing is turning out the way I planned it! Plan A: Live in a penthouse and star on Broadway. Plan B… I don’t have a plan B! What do I tell my father now?

PEYTON
That you came to a very special city determined to be someone very special, which you are.

SHARPAY
Oh, I’m not so special. I’m just like everyone else. Maybe a little better.

PEYTON
Look at it this way. Boi is your dog, and he has an opportunity, so be happy for him.

SHARPAY
You’re right. I’m being, you know, what’s the word? When you do something for yourself even though it’s not so good for other people?

PEYTON
Selfish?

SHARPAY
No! Oh, yeah.

PEYTON
Look, Sharpay, you can’t give up. Okay? And, anyway, you’re officially the star of my film.

SHARPAY
I am?

PEYTON
Yeah, you are.

SHARPAY
Oh. So now it’s all about you?

PEYTON
Only because I need you here.

SHARPAY
Fine. I’ll star in your movie.

PEYTON
Okay. Good, good!

SHARPAY
Okay, change of strategy.

PEYTON
I didn’t know you had a strategy, but I like the way you think.

SHARPAY
If Boi becomes a success, everyone will see me as well. After all, I am his entourage. I am the one who’s holding his leash. His fame will ultimately lead to my fame. That’s what I came here for, right?

PEYTON
Still a little selfish, but heading in the right direction.

SHARPAY
We’re gonna do this. It’s like I tell the housekeepers. If you can’t see the bright side, polish the dull side.

PEYTON
Yeah, not quite what I was talking…

SHARPAY
They want Boi to audition? It’s Boi they will get!


CUT TO:
(SLOW MUSIC PLAYING ON PIANO)

SHARPAY
(SINGING) When a sign of the times is the times are extremely tough

BOI
(WHIMPERING)

SHARPAY
(SHUSHING)
When you look at the world and the world that you see is

BOI
(BARKS)

SHARPAY
Yes, rough
When you feel like a long lost pup
And you need some cheering up
Sit back, relax and watch us do our stuff

Two, three, four
We’re gonna sit and shake your hand
That’s how it starts
We’re gonna nose our nosy way into your hearts
We’ll sing and bark in two-part harmony
You’re gonna love us
That’s our guarantee
We’ll bow together on the count of three
Me and my Boi
My Boi and me

We make the perfect pair
We’ve got that savoir-faire

BOI
(BARKING)

SHARPAY
Me and my Boi

BOI
(BARKING)

SHARPAY
Me and my Boi
My Boi and me

(LAUGHING)

GILL
Wait!

NEAL
That’s the best audition I’ve ever seen!

GILL
I’m Gill Samms, the director.

NEAL
Neal Roberts, writer.

GILL
That was amazing!

NEAL
Chills. Feel my hand…

GILL
I won’t feel your hand, but I believe you.

NEAL
I won’t feel your hand either, but I believe you, too.

GILL
That is one special dog.

NEAL
We’ve done special here. Special has been done, people!

GILL
Boi was meant for Broadway.

SHARPAY
We both were.

BOI
(BARKS)

SHARPAY
So, when do we start?

Well, there’s one more waiting.

One more!

One more, people!

STAGE MANAGER
Could you take a seat in the front row, please? There. Roger Elliston the third. And his dog, Countess.

ROGER
FYI, I’m Roger. As you can see by our extensive resume, hand-printed on carbonless, environmental-friendly rice paper, Countess has numerous major Broadway credits under her paws, including The Collar Purple, Three Puppy Opera, and the original Broadway cast production of A Wagging Tail of Two Cities, a musical opera in German. Major pedigree.

I’m impressed.

This is us impressed.

ROGER
Plus, she can bark a high C with sustained vibrato.

SHARPAY
Sure, but only dogs can hear it.
(LAUGHING)

All right. Let’s see what Countess can do.

(ME AND MY GIRL)

NEAL
That’s the best audition I’ve ever seen!

GILL
Amazing! I weeped!

NEAL
Wept.

GILL
I wept!

NEAL
I wept!

GILL
And not just regular weeping. Theater weeping!

NEAL
Amber Lee, what do you think?

GILL
Yes. Amber Lee, thoughts?

AMBER LEE
Wow… We are so meant to be BFFs! Wow! “Wow” is a word, right?

Right. Wow!

ROGER
I just hope that the palpable chemistry surging between you and I right now like nuclear fusion won’t in any way influence your decision towards our clearly superior audition.

AMBER LEE
How old are you?

ROGER
Twelve.

AMBER LEE
I think I’m good. And you, also! Your dog… Wow! Wow.

SHARPAY
I know, right?

BOI
(BARKING)

SHARPAY
He’s just saying hi. Sharpay Evans of the New Mexico Evans. I’m a mega fan.

AMBER LEE
Oh, you are not!

SHARPAY
So am!

AMBER LEE
I am gonna tweet about you right now.

SHARPAY
Shut up! I follow your tweets.
(CELL PHONE CHIMING)
She did! She tweeted!

AMBER LEE
Okay, I don’t know how we’re gonna decide. You’re amazing!

ROGER
All this and a grade school diploma.

AMBER LEE
And you, amazing! Wow. I would be excited to work with either one of you and your dogs. And can I just say, this is the opportunity of a lifetime for me. Because Broadway… Broadway’s not like film or television, because with Broadway, real people are watching.

Wow.

SHARPAY
Me, too.

AMBER LEE
I am just so excited to be performing on the Great White Way! Not that I don’t love all colors.

Well, I know both these talented dogs want to work with you. But only one can be in the show.

How are we gonna decide?

Wait. How about we work with both dogs during rehearsals?

AMBER LEE
Wait! How about we work with both dogs during rehearsals! That way I could see which one I work best with.

GILL
That sounds like a solution.

NEAL
We have a solution, people!

AMBER LEE
Can I just say how totally great I think you are?

SHARPAY
You do, and I’ll never wash my ears again.

AMBER LEE
You know what I think? Well, of course you don’t because I just thought of it, but I think they loved you!

SHARPAY
I like the way you think!

AMBER LEE
And you’re such a good singer. And I would know: My album went triple platinum.

SHARPAY
Well, I’ve done quite a bit of theater.

AMBER LEE
It totally shows. Listen, I’m gonna have my assistant give you my phone number. If there’s anything that you need, you just let me know, okay? We girls gotta stick together, right?

ASSISTANT
Here.

SHARPAY
Wow. I mean, this is actually your number! It looks like any ordinary number, but it’s not. It’s yours!

AMBER LEE
Oh, and, hey, may the best dog win!

SHARPAY
Thanks!


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
(SQUEALING SOFTLY) Yes! Yes! Yes! Can you believe it?

PEYTON
You were great! Boi was great.

SHARPAY
This new strategy just might work.

PEYTON
Amber Lee really likes you, too.

SHARPAY
Is she awesome or what? She inspires me. There. I said it. Quelle inspired. We are so gonna get that part.

PEYTON
How do you know?

SHARPAY
Easy. I don’t do rejection.

ROGER
Sharpay! I just wanted to wish you both luck.

SHARPAY
Oh! That’s so nice of you.

ROGER
And suggest that you give up now, while you still have your dignity. Distant though it already might be.

SHARPAY
Sorry, which Smurf are you again?

ROGER
True, you have talent. But you lack both the experience and the finesse to ever achieve the Holy Grail of possibility.

SHARPAY
Yeah, but Boi is cuter.

PEYTON
Countess is a theatrical ninja.

SHARPAY
(SNORING) I’m sorry. For a minute there you just bored me to death.

ROGER
I have a foolproof strategy of getting what I want: See it, want it, have a fit, get it.

SHARPAY
Yeah, well, this playdate’s over.

ROGER
I hope you enjoy rejection. We’re gonna get that part.

SHARPAY
We’re gonna destroy you.

ROGER
Bring it on.

SHARPAY
Oh, it’s brought.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
All right, Boi. This foot. That foot. Good boy! Yeah! Okay, let’s try our next one. Stay. Catch your tail. Catch your tail! Good! Yeah, good. Sit. Stay. We are so going to take them on. I’m not gonna let some hobbit get in my way. And, look. All Boi can do is think about how horrible that other little mangy dog was.

BOI
(WHIMPERING)

PEYTON
If you want success so badly, then you will get it. All you need is one shot to make it happen.

SHARPAY
Yeah, and this is my shot.

PEYTON
It’s like my grandmother says. “God only got one book published, and look how well it did for him.”

SHARPAY
Doing this is all I’ve ever dreamed about, especially since I already have everything else.

PEYTON
Well, there’s still humility.

SHARPAY
What’s wrong with being confident?

PEYTON
Confidence is when you know you’re good. Arrogance is when you think others know you’re good.

SHARPAY
Well, I want everyone to know I’m as good as I think everyone thinks I am without them knowing I know they think it. And do you have to film everything?

PEYTON
Yep, ’cause this is my shot. If my professor loves my film, he talks about it. Then there’s a buzz, then it gets in a festival, then it gets distribution, then I’m signing a studio deal, then I’m getting an Oscar.

SHARPAY
(SIGHS) I always knew I wanted to be an actress the first time I produced and performed the entire production of Snow White. Full dance, musical numbers, handmade costumes. I made my brother play all the dwarfs. Everyone in that pre-school worshipped me.

PEYTON
(LAUGHS)

SHARPAY
I just want to wake up every morning and be onstage.


CUT TO:
GILL
Good morning!

Good morning, everyone.

And welcome to the first rehearsal…

Of the new Broadway musical. A Girl’s Best Friend! And you are all amazing.

No, you are!

Him or me?

You!

No, you!

Me? Okay!

And heading our superb cast, we are thrilled to welcome one of the biggest stars around, Amber Lee Adams!

AMBER LEE
Oh, stop!

NEAL
Yes!

AMBER LEE
Guys, come on. Can I just say that this, this is the opportunity of a lifetime for me. Broadway’s not like film or television, because with Broadway, people can see if you write your lines on your hands!

(ALL LAUGHING)

All right. Let’s rehearse. I want everybody downstairs with piano, rehearsing the music for the opening number. Amber Lee and Judith, I want you onstage so we can block that first scene.

Let’s go!

Let’s go, people!

All right. Let’s start with Boi. Let’s go!

AMBER LEE
What a perfect goodbye party. Thank you, Mom!

JUDITH
I can’t believe my little girl is going out into the world on her own for the first time.

AMBER LEE
I have to, Mom. And who knows, maybe I’ll find fame and fortune! Actually, reverse that.

GILL AND NEAL
(LAUGHING)

AMBER LEE
Why is that funny?

NEAL
Well… Because you’d rather have the… I’ll explain later. Just keep going.

AMBER LEE
There’s only one thing that breaks my heart: Leaving Shelby behind.

SHARPAY
Pick it up! Go, go! A star is about to be born!

AMBER LEE
Shelby! What’s in this envelope? This very wet envelope.

GILL AND NEAL
(LAUGHING)

AMBER LEE
Again, I don’t get that.

Keep going.

AMBER LEE
Gasp!

NEAL
Actually, that’s a stage direction: You gasp, you don’t say “gasp.”

GILL
Simple mistake. Keep going.

AMBER LEE
(GASPS) Shelby! Trying to run away with my boarding pass won’t change the fact that I’m leaving at 8:00 a.m. 6:00 a.m.

GILL AND NEAL
(LAUGHS)

BOI
(BARKS)

AMBER LEE
Oh, Shelby. This is the first time we’ll be apart. I wish I could just pack you up in a widdle doggie bag.

(CHUCKLING)

Okay. Let’s get Countess in there and continue.

JUDITH
Don’t worry, sweetheart. Shelby and I will both be here when you get back.

You’re killing me.

AMBER LEE
Oh!

NEAL
That is adorable!

AMBER LEE
You’re right, Shelby! Why not go with me? Any place that doesn’t want you, I don’t wanna be. Let’s see what New York has in store for us together!

Good. Let’s talk about the scene a bit, and we’ll do it again. And both dogs, great work!

AMBER LEE
Shelby! Trying to run away with my boarding pass won’t change the fact that I’m leaving at 8:00 a.m. 6:00 a.m.

What’s going on? The dog.

AMBER LEE
What is this? Somebody, please. The dog is licking me.

All right, all right. Get me the other dog!

ROGER
(SIGHING) Sorry. What can you do?

AMBER LEE
There’s only one thing that breaks my heart: Leaving Shelby behind.

ROGER
Okay, go, go!

SHARPAY
(DOG WHISTLE BLOWING)

GILL
Why is she twirling?

AMBER LEE
What is she doing?

ROGER
(GROANING)

AMBER LEE
Gill?

GILL
Roger! Figure out what’s going on with the dog. It’s not helping me.

NEAL
Not helping, people!

GILL
Meanwhile, get the other dog!

SHARPAY
Sorry. What can you do?

AMBER LEE
There’s only one thing that breaks my heart: Leaving Shelby behind.

SHARPAY
Okay, go!

Oh, hey!

(BARKS)

(CAT MEWING)
(CAT SCREECHING)

(CRASHING)

(EXCLAIMING)

AMBER LEE
How is this helping? Really. Am I the only one bothered by this? Gill?

GILL
Okay, everybody, that’s 10!

ROGER
I’ll admit you’re good. But we’re better. Give up!

SHARPAY
Give up? Not until there’s a Broadway marquee with a picture of my dog so big you can walk by and smell his puppy breath!

STAGE MANAGER
I have to take the dogs for a nap. Union rules. Thank you.

SHARPAY
You break first.

ROGER
No, you break first.

AMBER LEE
Oh!

STAGE MANAGER
Pretty cute, huh?

AMBER LEE
Yeah! Yes, they are! I just wanted to tell you something. This is my show. I’m America’s sweetheart. They’re paying to see me, not you two over-bred fur balls. So, until I can figure out a way to get rid of you, you better watch your step, otherwise you’ll find out the real meaning of going home in a doggie bag. (CHUCKLES EVILLY)


CUT TO:
PEYTON
This film is cutting together really well.

SHARPAY
Do I look amazing?

PEYTON
The camera loves you.

SHARPAY
I know!

(COMPUTER CHIMES)

SHARPAY
Oh, no! My dad’s video-chatting me. He thinks I live in a penthouse. I can’t let him see that I live in a tiny studio in a filthy tenement. With a boy in my room! A boy, by the way, that has no money, and lives in a tinier studio, and who, apparently, has never heard of the word “maid-service”! No offense.

PEYTON
What of that could possibly offend me?

SHARPAY
(PANTING) Oh, my! Oh, my! I don’t know. Hyperventilating! What do I do? What do I do?

PEYTON
Come on. Come on. Hurry!

(COMPUTER CHIMING)

PEYTON
All right, scoot over. Okay, go, go.

SHARPAY
Okay, I gotta get this. Stop! Hi, Daddy!

VANCE
Hey, princess! How’s my little girl?

SHARPAY
Overpaying for everything and yelling at total strangers.

VANCE
(EXCLAIMS) You’re practically a native. Hey, where are you? That view is spectacular.

SHARPAY
Well, there’s hardly a penthouse in the city that doesn’t have a spectacular view!

VANCE
So, you the toast of Broadway?

SHARPAY
Daddy, you know how I feel about carb references.

VANCE
Just a little concerned, sweetie. The last time no one’s heard from you for this long was when you found out your gold card wasn’t actually made of gold.

SHARPAY
Well, I’ve been busy with rehearsals.

VANCE
Outstanding! You got into the show?

SHARPAY
Well, it doesn’t quite work like that. It’s complicated. But I know it’s gonna work out.

VANCE
Sharpay, is there something you’re not telling me? You remember the deal, right? If things aren’t working out…

SHARPAY
I know, I know. I have one month to get in the show, and then…

VANCE
Two weeks, sweetie. You have two weeks left. You’re sure everything’s okay?

SHARPAY
It’s fine, Daddy.

VANCE
Well, okay. We miss you, angel.

SHARPAY
Miss you, too. I love you! Boi has to get that role. I can’t go home. Not as a failure. I need some sort of subtle, visibly crushing advantage over Roger.

PEYTON
Look, why not just trust Boi is talented, that you’ve trained him well, and let fate take it from there.

SHARPAY
Fate? Fate gave a girl in my graduating class one long eyebrow. I can’t trust fate. Some matters you just have to take into your own hands.

AMBER LEE
What do you mean you forgot my bottled water?

ASSISTANT
Well, I was going to get those magazines that you said you wanted from across town, and I got hit by a bike messenger. So I went to the hospital for, like, just one second to get these stitches.

AMBER LEE
And meanwhile, I had no water!

ASSISTANT
I will get it for you right now.

AMBER LEE
Now I’ve had to drink tap!

ASSISTANT
I am so sorry.

AMBER LEE
(MOCKING) “I am so sorry.”

ASSISTANT
I will do better.

AMBER LEE
Forget it, okay? Aside from catching some shade from the shadow cast by your madam’s apple, you’re of no use to me. You’re… (WHIMPERING) fired!

ASSISTANT
(CRYING) God!

SHARPAY
Amber Lee?

AMBER LEE
Oh, wow! You look so cute, Sharpie!

SHARPAY
Sharpay.

AMBER LEE
You changed it. I like that even better. So, tell me, what’s on your mind?

SHARPAY
I just saw your assistant leave in tears.

AMBER LEE
She’s not my assistant. She quit.

SHARPAY
No wonder she was crying.

AMBER LEE
Yeah, I don’t think she even really cared. Next time I should probably just hire a best friend instead.

SHARPAY
Wait! Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

AMBER LEE
What are you thinking that I should be thinking?

SHARPAY
I could help you out until you replace her.

AMBER LEE
That is what I was thinking about thinking.

SHARPAY
Of course this can’t, in any way, affect your decision of which dog gets the starring role.

AMBER LEE
Oh, it won’t.

SHARPAY
I couldn’t live with myself if I thought I did anything unfair.

AMBER LEE
You have my word. Hey, I know! How about dinner?

SHARPAY
That sounds awesome!

AMBER LEE
Right? Get me a reservation for two at someplace fantastic. Then call my agent, have her meet me.

SHARPAY
Right. Sure.

AMBER LEE
Oh. I won’t forget this. And I promise, it won’t be because you’re helping me if I happen to take a little extra liking to Girl.

SHARPAY
Boi.

AMBER LEE
You changed it. I like that even better. Oh, and can you take my mic down to the sound guy and tell him the wire hurts my scalp.

SHARPAY
Okay.

AMBER LEE
You’re the best.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
Amber Lee says the wire is hurting her scalp. Personally, I think she’s using the wrong shampoo, but she’s the star, and you know, I don’t wanna say anything.

SOUND GUY
You’re hot.

SHARPAY
Excuse me?

SOUND GUY
You’re hot.

SHARPAY
Okay. Even though theater lighting highlights my natural skin tones, thank you for noticing, that’s a little rude, don’t you think?

SOUND GUY
No. Your mic’s hot. It means it’s on. You see that little switch. When it’s flipped over like that, it means it’s on and it’s going through the entire theater.

SHARPAY
Well, you could have led with that part, thank you. Amber Lee’s got a great scalp!


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
(LAUGHS) You’re hot. Then she asked me to help her out after her assistant quit. And after I suggested it.

PEYTON
Are you sure this is wise? I’m sorry. Let me re-phrase that. This isn’t wise.

SHARPAY
It’s perfect. Amber Lee will see that she and I are exactly alike, we’ll become BFFs, she’ll make sure Boi gets the role, then his fame becomes my fame! I mean, this is the advantage I’ve been waiting for!

PEYTON
Isn’t it more like taking advantage?

SHARPAY
And my father thought I couldn’t do this in a month. It’s turning out better than I imagined.


CUT TO:
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

SHARPAY
Hello? Sure. Be right over.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
(SIGHING)
Hello?

AMBER LEE
Oh, thank goodness. In here, quickly. I just… I can’t reach that.

SHARPAY
Can’t reach it?

AMBER LEE
Okay, it was a little bit of a test. Only a true friend would come all the way down here at this hour and help me with something like that.

SHARPAY
So, I passed?

AMBER LEE
Yes.

(GIGGLING)

AMBER LEE
But, seriously, the purse.

SHARPAY
Okay.


CUT TO:
AMBER LEE
Thank you.

SHARPAY
All right, here’s your bag. Here’s your other bag. Oh, and don’t forget your photo shoot.

AMBER LEE
Oh, you’re a lifesaver. You must be at that photo shoot to make sure I look as fabulous as you always do.

SHARPAY
Are you serious?

AMBER LEE
Serious? You’re now also my stylist. You have to tell me all your secrets. Okay, gotta go.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
“Life is so strange: Shelby and I travel halfway across the country to find fame and fortune, and instead, we find love.”

PEYTON
Hey! How about dinner? Split some egg rolls at Wok This Way?

SHARPAY
Can’t. I have to highlight script changes for Amber Lee, then highlight her hair. Highlight of my night!

PEYTON
Okay. But I miss spending time with you. And you did promise to shoot some more stuff for my film.

SHARPAY
You know, what I’m doing is important, too.

PEYTON
For a minute there, you sounded like Amber Lee.


CUT TO:
AMBER LEE
Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Bad news: My maid quit. So, here’s a list of chores.

SHARPAY
Chores?

AMBER LEE
And I want to talk to you about Boi. But you have to promise it’ll stay between us.

SHARPAY
Okay.

AMBER LEE
I think I’m going to ask the director to give Boi the part.

SHARPAY
Are you serious?

AMBER LEE
Almost positive!

SHARPAY
You won’t be sorry.

AMBER LEE
Trust me. I know.


CUT TO:
(RUMBLING)

Oh, no.

STAGE MANAGER
There are some changes for the blocking in the dog scene, top of act two.

ROGER
Countess can learn these in no time. She’s got a memory like a digital hard drive: No bark and all mega-bite.

STAGE MANAGER
Funny. I need to find Sharpay and make sure she gets them. Boi is doing the first run-through tomorrow.

ROGER
I’d be more than happy to deliver them to her.

STAGE MANAGER
Great.

ROGER
Thank you.

STAGE MANAGER
Thank you.

ROGER
Sharpay? (SIGHS) That’s unfortunate.

And I’ve been here ever since.


CUT TO:
AMBER LEE
Life is so strange: Shelby and I travel halfway across the country to find fame and fortune, and instead, we find love. Lenore, I have something to ask you. We have something to ask you.

BOI
(BARKING)

AMBER LEE
He’s supposed to come from the other side of the stage with the ring box!

Yeah, sorry. We changed that blocking.

AMBER LEE
What happened? What is wrong with this dog? And is he okay? It’s not his fault. He’s just a little dog! He’s just so sweet.

GILL
Okay, everybody. Let’s break for a few. That’s 10, people.

I’m aware. I know.

SHARPAY
I don’t know what happened.

We sent out the script changes, but Boi didn’t do them.

SHARPAY
But I didn’t get any new script change.

ROGER
(SIGHS) I looked everywhere last night to give them to you. I guess working for Amber Lee has its drawbacks.

SHARPAY
You did this on purpose.

ROGER
That’s a complete… Yeah.

SHARPAY
You’re threatened because you know Amber Lee is gonna choose Boi.

ROGER
Not after today she won’t.

SHARPAY
Okay. Countess doesn’t have half the personality that Boi has.

ROGER
And Boi doesn’t have half the talent that Countess has. Isn’t that right, girl? Countess?

SHARPAY
Boi? Has anyone seen Boi?

No, sorry.

ROGER
Countess?

SHARPAY
Boi?

ROGER
Anyone seen Countess?

Nope.

ROGER
Countess?

SHARPAY
Boi?


CUT TO:
(CELL PHONE RINGING)

PEYTON
Hello?

SHARPAY
Boi and Countess are gone!

PEYTON
Gone! What?

SHARPAY
We have to find them!

PEYTON
Wait, where are you now?

SHARPAY
Leaving the theater. We’re gonna look around here. Can you look near the apartment in case they come back?

PEYTON
Yeah, yeah. Of course. Just keep me posted, and I’ll call you if they show up.

SHARPAY
Okay. What if they were dog-napped?

ROGER
Do you think we pushed them too hard?

SHARPAY
I don’t know.

ROGER
Countess is uber-sensitive. She cries watching dog food commercials!

SHARPAY
I just hope they’re not huddled in a corner somewhere. Afraid, lost, at each other’s throats!


CUT TO:
DOGGY DAY OUT MONTAGE; SOUNDTRACK: "BABY" - LUCAS GRABEEL COVERING JUSTIN BIEBER


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
What if we never see them again?

ROGER
They’re smart dogs. Smarter than we are. They’ll be okay.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

SHARPAY
Oh, no. It’s my dad. I just… I can’t deal with him right now.

BOI
(BARKING)

ROGER
Countess!

SHARPAY
Boi!

ROGER
I missed you!

SHARPAY
You’re back!

PEYTON
It’s amazing. They came back to the apartment.

SHARPAY
Thanks, Peyton.

ROGER
Oh, and Sharpay, it’s still on.

SHARPAY
Bring it.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
You’re back! Yeah! You bad, bad boy, Boi. I’m just glad you’re okay.

PEYTON
He and Countess had an adventure.

SHARPAY
She probably coaxed him into joining a doggy gang or something. We’d better check him over for tattoos.

PEYTON
Are you so lost in what you’re doing that you haven’t noticed?

SHARPAY
Noticed what?

PEYTON
Boi and Countess are in love.

SHARPAY
With what?

PEYTON
Each other.

SHARPAY
No way! You’re right. He’s dilated. He’s got puppy dog eyes. How could I have not noticed puppy love?

PEYTON
Well, there’s a lot you haven’t noticed. Like lately, you’ve had no time for me. You know, I was counting on you to help me finish my film.

SHARPAY
I said I would, and I will. Things have become complicated.

PEYTON
It’s not that complicated. Amber Lee is using you, and you’re letting her.

SHARPAY
You don’t know what you’re talking about.

PEYTON
I don’t?

SHARPAY
No!

PEYTON
Where’s the Sharpay that was determined not to go back home because she didn’t want to work for anyone?

SHARPAY
Why don’t you tell me?

PEYTON
Working for someone, that’s where. So at least be honest as to why.

SHARPAY
I know what I’m doing.

PEYTON
You’ve sold your soul to get Boi in that show, rather than trust in the dog that you raised. Even worse, you've stopped trusting that your own talents would get you where you need to go.

SHARPAY
And maybe you’re jealous because I’m on my way up with a new famous friend, and you’re just a student making a film about someone else’s life instead of your own.

PEYTON
You don’t have to be in my movie anymore. I get it. You have more important things to do.

SHARPAY
Fine!

PEYTON
One question: What happened to that hot pink whirlwind of confidence and ambition I saw through my lens that first day you got here? I mean, that girl knew she was special. That girl knew she didn’t have to do any of this to succeed. What happened to her, huh?

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

SHARPAY
Hello.


CUT TO:
AMBER LEE
Oh, and Sharpay, can you remember to invite as many people from my fan club as possible to opening-night dress rehearsal? I want the theater filled with people who love me as much as you do!

SHARPAY
Sure.

AMBER LEE
You know what would be great after all this work? A long, luxurious spa bath.

SHARPAY
(SIGHING) Sounds amazing! Thank you.

AMBER LEE
Run one for me, will you? And then you can finish these. You’re the best!

SHARPAY
(SIGHING)


CUT TO:
GILL
This is a big change.

NEAL
Huge change!

AMBER LEE
I don’t think you’re hearing me!

GILL
New Jersey can hear you! The name of the show is A Girl’s Best Friend.

AMBER LEE
I didn’t tell you to change the title.

NEAL
But you want the best friend written out!

AMBER LEE
Oh. Right. Change the title!

GILL
How are we supposed to get rid of one of our main characters a day before our dress rehearsal in front of an audience?

AMBER LEE
The audience is coming to see me. You change that dog’s part to a bark and play dead, or I don’t go on.

Let’s be reasonable here.

AMBER LEE
I’m a star. I don’t have to be reasonable! Look, those mangy mutts are bothering me almost as much as their disposable owners. I actually had to have one of them clean my toilet just to keep her away. She thinks she’s an actress. (AMBER LEE LAUGHS) She acts all right. She acts just like every other obsessed fan.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
Wait. Everything you said… You were…

PEYTON
Right? Thank you.

SHARPAY
You must think I’m a total fool.

PEYTON
No. Not total.

SHARPAY
Maybe my dad was right. (CRYING) Maybe I’m not ready for this. Maybe I should just go home and… (STAMMERING) work for him. I mean, did I really think I was just gonna come to Broadway and be a star?

PEYTON
Because that’s exactly how you think. It’s perfect.

SHARPAY
Perfect is so hard. And it doesn’t prepare you for disappointment.

PEYTON
Well, if it helps, you still look adorable, even when you’re disappointed.

SHARPAY
Yeah, that doesn’t help.

PEYTON
Look, Sharpay. There is not a marquee big enough or lights bright enough to contain the fame you’re gonna have.

SHARPAY
Yeah, but not the way I’ve been doing it. (SNIFFLING) Like you said, the Sharpay you know isn’t the Sharpay that has become the Sharpay that is this Sharpay.

PEYTON
Did all the Sharpays follow that?

SHARPAY
I sacrificed integrity for opportunity. I let someone insecure distract me. I cleaned a bathroom! But worst of all, I disappointed someone I care about. I forgot what was really important to me. I lost track of what I want.

PEYTON
And other than maid service and a canopy bed, what is it that you want?

SHARPAY
A fair fight. A lifetime in the spotlight. And maybe you’ll still let me be in your movie.

PEYTON
I guess.


CUT TO:
(CAR HORNS HONKING)

SHARPAY
(SIGHS)
Okay, I can’t say I approve of dating beneath your station in life, but fine. Go.

ROGER
(EXCLAIMS) Hey, I got your text. What’s C-Q-M-T-W-I-L-G-T mean?

SHARPAY
“Come quick. Major trouble. Wow, I look great today.” Duh.

ROGER
I really should have gotten that.

SHARPAY
Listen, Amber Lee Adams isn’t what you think.

ROGER
A self absorbed, two-faced panther who would eat her young alive on a reality show rather than allow anyone to steal her spotlight?

SHARPAY
Okay, she’s what you think.

ROGER
Listen, I don’t care if her parents had to tie beefjerky around her neck just to get the family dog to play with her, as long as Countess is at her side on that stage.

SHARPAY
That’s what I’m trying to tell you. She wants the part of the dog written out completely!

ROGER
That’s not fair!

SHARPAY
Too far.

ROGER
Well, I am 12, remember?

SHARPAY
Roger, we’ve been fighting the wrong battle, each other. We need to form an alliance and work against a common enemy.

ROGER
Zits?

SHARPAY
Amber Lee. Trust me, the zit battle is one you won’t win.

ROGER
But what can we do?

SHARPAY
Tonight is the dress rehearsal. The audience will be filled with members of Amber Lee Adams’ fan club.

ROGER
I know, I saw the tweet. Fine. Yes, I follow her, too.

SHARPAY
Okay, we need to show people exactly who Amber Lee really is. It’s time someone taught her how to behave in the theater.

ROGER
I like the way you think. It’s manipulative, but for a good cause. Tell me what you need me to do.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
Hey, Amber Lee, I…

AMBER LEE
Where have you been? I have been trying to reach you all day.

SHARPAY
Oh. Sorry, my phone must have been turned off.

AMBER LEE
Without asking me first?

SHARPAY
I just wanted to say good luck. You know, I know you chose Countess for this performance tonight, and I’m fine with that.

AMBER LEE
Well, it was nothing personal, but your phone was shut off, so I couldn’t talk to you about it. I guess that won’t happen again, will it?

SHARPAY
We’re good. Hug? Okay.


CUT TO:
(ALL CHATTERING)

GILL
Hello, everyone. I’m Gill, the director.

NEAL
And I’m Neal, the under-appreciated writer.

(ALL LAUGHING)

And we are thrilled that you’re here for our first performance in front of an audience. Does everyone here know how to applaud? Okay, how about the balcony up there?

SHARPAY
Okay, now.

NEAL
Can you hear us? You’re good!

AMBER LEE
(VOCALIZING)

BOI AND COUNTESS
(BARKING)

AMBER LEE
(SCREAMS) Will somebody please control these wannabe werewolves? Hello? People? See, this is exactly why I didn’t want to do a show with dogs! I’m the star, not them! Stage people? Could somebody please put these rats with rabies out of my misery? Anyone! Finally, you idiot! What took so long? Now, hurry up and get these flea-bitten fur bags out of here! There are people waiting to see me!

SHARPAY
Okay, go now.

AMBER LEE
You think all those boring freaks with no lives came to worship two no-name mutts? I don’t think so! I’m the one they love! Me! They came to see…

(ALL BOOING)

AMBER LEE
(BREATHING HEAVILY)

SHARPAY
I knew I forgot to tell you something: Careful, your mic’s on.

AMBER LEE
You did this to me. You ruined me!

SHARPAY
News flash: You ruined you!

AMBER LEE
Oh, what do you know? You’re a nobody! The only reason you even wanted to be my friend is so I’d choose your dog!

SHARPAY
No, no. At first, I idolized you, even more than myself, which isn’t easy. But you’re not at all what I thought you were.

AMBER LEE
(SCOFFS) You and I are exactly alike.

SHARPAY
Except I don’t enjoy letting people down. I don’t use people to feel better about myself. And I definitely don’t wear yellow and orange in the same week, let alone the same outfit, okay? Maybe I did think you and I were alike, but not anymore. In fact, I’d be embarrassed if someone thought I was like you.

AMBER LEE
Well, I quit! And without me, there’s no show. Now neither one of your furry little friends will have their shot and neither will you. Blame her!

SHARPAY
I’m sorry. Someone had to say it.

GILL
I’ll go talk some sense into her. You, out of this theater right now.

ROGER
Wait, Sharpay. If you go, then I’ll go, too.

SHARPAY
No. You wanted this as badly as I did. This mess was my idea. You win.

ROGER
That’s not what it feels like.


CUT TO:
(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

PEYTON
Hey. Can I come in?

SHARPAY
Sure.

PEYTON
So, you’re really leaving, huh?

SHARPAY
Yeah. I’m packing my carry-on stuff first.

PEYTON
I wish you weren’t going.

SHARPAY
Me, too.

PEYTON
Have you thought about what you’re gonna do now?

SHARPAY
Move home where there’s enough room for my pores to open, spend months in the spa getting this layer of New York grime off my skin, and mostly…miss you.

PEYTON
Look, I know exactly how to help that: Don’t go.

SHARPAY
I already talked to my dad. I guess I’m gonna start… (STAMMERING)

PEYTON
You don’t have to say it.

SHARPAY
Thank you.

PEYTON
What about your dream of being a star?

SHARPAY
It’s still there. It’s just a little bit more of a dream than a reality. You know what today is?

PEYTON
What?

SHARPAY
I got here exactly one month ago. My time was up tonight anyway.

PEYTON
Well, so then you still have eight hours. This isn’t how my movie’s supposed to end.

SHARPAY
I guess it is.

(PHONE RINGING)

SHARPAY
This is Sharpay. Uh-huh. Sure. No, no. I’ll be there.
(SIGHS) That was the stage manager. They want me to come to the theater and clear out Boi’s things.

PEYTON
I can go with you if you want.

SHARPAY
I want.


CUT TO:
GILL
And, so, Amber Lee has quit.

NEAL
Gone.

GILL
Kaput.

NEAL
The producers feel, without a star, we can’t open. The time it would take to find someone who could learn the role and do it well might take weeks, and it would cost too much to keep the production going.

GILL
But we want you all to know, it was great almost working with you.

SHARPAY
I’m gonna meet you outside.

PEYTON
All right.

GILL
Thank you for your hard work.

We are so, so sorry, people.

PEYTON
Wait! Wait, it’s not over. It’s not over. Look, it doesn’t have to be. Look, there is someone who knows the part by heart and who is amazing. All right, maybe she’s not a star yet, but she will be. This show will make her one. Just watch.


CUT TO:
SHARPAY
Boi, keep your voice down. Peyton, start shooting the rehearsal. Boi, go mark. Go mark. Good! Okay, stay. Stay. I love when you use that accent, but… (SHUSHING) We’re not supposed to be in here. Okay, now let’s do the scene where the character Lenore thinks she’s lost everything and you come over to console her. Come on.

"Shelby, what is going on? I feel invisible here. Nothing is working out the way I planned it.

(SINGING) I got something inside of me
Something that needs to be heard
Deep down a voice is guiding me
Hidden emotions have stirred
Why have I let others lead the way
When all along I know what it is
I want to say

Whatever it is
I’ll do it
I’m the answer to your prayers
Whatever you want
Stop looking
Nobody else compares
Whatever you’ve seen before
I’ll give you so much more
You’ll be totally impressed
I’m New York’s best kept secret

I thought I had a perfect plan
Where I would wind up on top
One day I’m thinking, “Yes I can”
Next thing you know, I’m a flop
Why did I ever play this silly game?
I got to shake up the rules
And stake my claim

Whatever it is
I’ll do it
I’m the answer to your prayers
Whatever you want
Stop looking
Nobody else compares
Whatever you’ve seen before
I’ll give you so much more
You’ll be totally impressed
I’m New York’s best kept secret

What if I missed my window?
What if I blew my shot?
What if the only chance I was going to get I already got?
I’m not ready to turn the page until I’m on stage in a show
No, nobody move
I’ve got something to prove
Don’t you know?

Whatever it is
I’ll do it
I’m the answer to your prayers
Whatever you want
Stop looking
Nobody else compares
Whatever you’ve seen before
I’ll give you so much more
You’ll be totally impressed
I’m New York’s best kept secret

(HUMMING)


CUT TO:
PEYTON
Well, did I tell you?

(LAUGHING)

GILL
Amazing!

NEAL
Amazing! You’re amahzing!

GILL
You have more depth, range and tone in one note than Amber Lee had in her entire surgically reshaped body.

NEAL
We’ll promote you as “The girl who we’re promoting.” The producers will love it.

SHARPAY
Wait, wait. What are you saying?

GILL
We need you to save the show.

SHARPAY
Seriously?

GILL
We know it’s a risk.

NEAL
A gamble.

GILL
A risk. Did I do “risk” already?

NEAL
You did. And, true, we did fire you.

GILL
He fired you.

NEAL
But now I’m un-firing you.

GILL
Can we do that?

NEAL
Just did.

GILL
Good for us!

NEAL
We need you.

GILL
What do you say?

SHARPAY
Um… (STAMMERING) I guess we could take the costumes in a few sizes and get everyone used to hearing the songs sung on key, but there’s one condition: Boi and Countess split the role of Shelby the dog equally.

GILL
Done!

NEAL
We’ve a lot of work to do, people!

GILL
Are we crazy?

NEAL
Crazy for theater!

GILL
Let’s rehearse!

NEAL
Let’s rehearse, people!

GILL
Where are those wonderful dogs?

SHARPAY
Thank you.

PEYTON
This is it. The chance you’ve been waiting for. (PEYTON SIGHING)

SHARPAY
What if I’m not ready for this?

PEYTON
Oh, you’re ready. “Ready” isn’t as ready as you are.

SHARPAY
What if I’m horrible?

PEYTON
Won’t happen.

SHARPAY
What if I forget my lines?

PEYTON
Impossible.

SHARPAY
What if I…

PEYTON
Everything in your life so far has been leading you to this moment. Your moment. Embrace it.

SHARPAY
I’m scared.

(THEY KISS)

PEYTON
Finally.

GILL
Let’s rehearse, people!


CUT TO:
(GIRLS SQUEALING)

GIRL
Over here!

REPORTER
Mr. Pinto, Mr. Pinto, over here. Mr. Pinto, look this way.

(ALL CHATTERING)

(INAUDIBLE)

(SCATTERED APPLAUSE)

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

SHARPAY
(SINGING)
I’ve got a feeling inside of me
Running all through my veins
It’s like electrical energy
A world about to change
It’s an open road
So here I go

The rest of my life
Is starting tonight
Feels like I’m finally on my way
I’m looking ahead
Can’t tell where it ends
But I’m gonna take a leap of faith
And I’m gonna hold on tight
And ride this ride
The rest of my life

I’m gonna go for it all out
I know there’s no guarantee
But I’ve been given a chance and now
What’s next is up to me
I’m gonna set my sights
So light those lights

The rest of my life
Is starting tonight
Feels like I’m finally on my way
I’m looking ahead
Can’t tell where it ends
But I’m gonna take a leap of faith
And I’m gonna hold on tight
And ride this ride
The rest of my life

If all the world’s a stage
I’m here to take my place
I know I’ll always find a way to shine

The rest of my life
Is starting tonight
Feels like I’m finally on my way
I’m looking ahead
Can’t tell where it ends
But I’m gonna take a leap of faith

The rest of my life
Is starting tonight
Feels like I’m finally on my way
It starts with a dream
Of who I could be
Wherever it takes me I can’t wait
So I’m gonna hold on tight
And ride this ride
The rest of my life

(ALL APPLAUDING)